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	<title>Weird Cousin&#187; Police</title>
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		<title>Stopping vs. Slowing Down</title>
		<link>http://www.weirdcousin.com/stopping-vs-slowing-down/</link>
		<comments>http://www.weirdcousin.com/stopping-vs-slowing-down/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 08 Nov 2009 02:45:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[law]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Law Enforcement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lawyer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Police]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.weirdcousin.com/?p=798</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff&#8217;s deputy. He thinks that he is smarter than the deputy because he is a lawyer from New York and is certain that he has a better education then any cop from Texas. He decides to prove this to himself and have some&#8230;<br /><span class="more-link-wrapper"><a href="http://www.weirdcousin.com/stopping-vs-slowing-down/" class="more-link">Read More</a></span>]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff&#8217;s deputy. He thinks that he is smarter than the deputy because he is a lawyer from New York and is certain that he has a better education then any cop from Texas. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Texas deputy&#8217;s expense.</p>
<p>Deputy says, &#8220;License and registration, please.&#8221;</p>
<p>Lawyer says, &#8220;What for?&#8221;</p>
<p>Deputy says, &#8220;You didn&#8217;t come to a complete stop at the stop sign.&#8221;</p>
<p>Lawyer says, &#8220;I slowed down, and no one was coming.&#8221;</p>
<p>Deputy says, &#8220;You still didn&#8217;t come to a complete stop. License and registration, please.&#8221;</p>
<p>Lawyer says, &#8220;What&#8217;s the difference?&#8221;</p>
<p>Deputy says, &#8220;The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that&#8217;s the law. License and registration, please!&#8221;</p>
<p>Lawyer says, &#8220;If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I&#8217;ll give you my license and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don&#8217;t give me the ticket.&#8221;</p>
<p>Deputy says, &#8220;Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir.&#8221;</p>
<p>The deputy takes out his nightstick and starts beating the ever-loving crap out of the lawyer and says, &#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230; &#8220;Do you want met to stop, or just slow down?&#8221;</p>
<p>__________</p>
<p>Related Content</p>
<ul>
<li><a title="Reporting A Crime In Process" href="../reporting-a-crime-in-process/">Reporting A Crime In Process</a></li>
<li><a title="Stupid Criminal Alert" href="../stupid-criminal-alert/">Stupid Criminal Alert</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.kevinstilley.com/arrest-your-own-mother/" target="_blank">Arresting Your Own Mother</a></li>
</ul>
<p>__________</p>
<p><a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0740760750/righteousjudg-20"><img src="http://images.amazon.com/images/P/0740760750.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg" alt="Book Cover" /></a></p>

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		</item>
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		<title>Reporting A Crime In Process</title>
		<link>http://www.weirdcousin.com/reporting-a-crime-in-process/</link>
		<comments>http://www.weirdcousin.com/reporting-a-crime-in-process/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 04 Jun 2009 18:33:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Featured]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Aging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Criminal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Police]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.weirdcousin.com/?p=722</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[George Phillips, age 82 of Meridian, Mississippi was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he&#8217;d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed&#8230;<br /><span class="more-link-wrapper"><a href="http://www.weirdcousin.com/reporting-a-crime-in-process/" class="more-link">Read More</a></span>]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div id="attachment_725" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 235px"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0013FPP3I/righteousjudg-20"><img class="size-medium wp-image-725" title="police1" src="http://www.weirdcousin.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/police1-225x300.jpg" alt="police1" width="225" height="300" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">.</p></div>
<p>George Phillips,  age 82 of Meridian, Mississippi was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he&#8217;d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things. He  phoned the police, who asked &#8216;Is someone in your house?&#8217; He said &#8216;No.&#8217; Then they said &#8216;All patrols were busy.. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available.&#8217; George said, &#8216;Okay&#8217;.</p>
<p>He hung up the phone and counted to 30.  Then he phoned the police again. &#8216;Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don&#8217;t have to worry about them now because I just shot them.&#8217; and hung up.  Within five minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, two Fire  Trucks, a Paramedic, and an Ambulance showed up at the Phillips&#8217; residence, and caught the burglars red-handed. One of the Policemen said to George, &#8216;I thought you said that you shot them!&#8217;  George said, &#8216;I thought you said there was nobody available!&#8217;</p>
<p>__________</p>
<p>SIMILAR CONTENT</p>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.weirdcousin.com/crashing-cars-for-jesus/" target="_blank">Crashing Cars For Jesus</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.kevinstilley.com/arrest-your-own-mother/" target="_blank">Arrest Your Own Mother</a></li>
</ul>

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		<title>Seventy year old woman left bruised and bleeding after being arrrested for not watering her lawn</title>
		<link>http://www.weirdcousin.com/seventy-year-old-woman-left-bruised-and-bleeding-after-being-arrrested-for-not-watering-her-lawn/</link>
		<comments>http://www.weirdcousin.com/seventy-year-old-woman-left-bruised-and-bleeding-after-being-arrrested-for-not-watering-her-lawn/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 10 Jul 2007 22:17:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Police]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Violence]]></category>

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